When there is so much to do and not enough time to do everything, naturally we prioritise those things that are more important to us. But do we really? Or do we prioritise things just to avoid stress in some other area of our life? This might mean they aren’t really our own priorities at all; perhaps they are more likely to be someone else’s that you just picked up along the way. So what’s stopping you from speaking up?
It’s never as simple as just speaking your mind – there are usually other complicating factors bound up with expectations from others, or to ourselves. Especially others! Relationships, family, our jobs, or our bosses…
So how do we gain some balance and stop feeling torn between what we should be doing and what we want or need to be doing?
First is to know your own priorities for your wellbeing in each of the different areas of your life – so this might include thinking about what is important to you and what are your goals for your:
Family and Relationships
Where you Live
Career or Business
Leisure or Recreation
Personal Development (and Learning)
Health and Wellbeing.
Alongside your priorities or knowing what is important to you – also consider what your obligations or duty might be to yourself and others for each – so while these may not be a top priority for you, they are still important, and to not do them would perhaps cause some issue.
Now think about what challenges you face in achieving your goals or priorities in each area. Who might support you in your journey or quest to achieve these goals? Who might have done what you want to do already – and can they act as a mentor or role model for you? Sometimes these are people you may not have even met – they are heroes in history, or a character in a book. They may have died, yet you still admire their achievements and they continue to be a great role model for you.
So now you know what is important to you – you have more focus about where you can assign your time to achieve what you want out of life. Now you have more motivation to apply yourself to your priorities – as you have now identified what is important, and also what is not. You can also recognise when someone else’s priority might also serve you for your own – or also know when it won’t. Many people, when knowing all this, find it helps them to say to say ‘No’ or ‘Not right now…’ to activities that don’t meet their own goals or priorities.
If you want some help to determine your own life priorities, give me a call!